Wednesday, January 19, 2005

the girl with the broken smile-

today.
horrible?
no
unhorrible?
no

its nice in a sense.
>copying homework
>buttdropping
>small talk

its utterly horrible in another sense.
>a cat

why do you have to constantly and surprisingly remind me you are alive?
you are in my heart, the bottom of it.
so just stop appearing.
you make me wna scream cry stomp punch when i see you.
stop looking at me that way.
it breaks my heart.

WHY MUST PEOPLE CHANGE?
you change.
youu change.

and we were so close back then.

i was close to you.
we would msg everyday.
we would smile and wave and talk to each other when we meet.
you would rush down to just talk to me.
you would tell me everything.
we just never run out of things to say.
you were so nice back then.
i only agreed to be your sis cos i thought i saw something in you.
something nice.
perhaps, i saw wrongly.
you changed for the better, for at most a month.
then down you went.
i dont regret knowing you.
youve changed my life in a way no one could.
youve made me realise what it means to love someone, but not in the bgr way.
i love you, alot alot.
you would never know.

i was even closer to youu.
we would talk each time we meet.
we would talk online.
talk in school.
with the occasional call.
ive grown to expect to see youu in front of me.
chattering nonstop, smiling.
i miss everything about youu.
right down to the lalala that regularly irritates me.
and i miss everytime youu send me home.
it bothers me the way i look at youu, expecting youu to suddenly start ruffling my hair.
pinching my cheek.
or just sit beside me and we would start talking.
what i regret?
letting myself love youu.
youu rock youu know, youre a great friend.
youu know your own weaknesses.
youu said youu would change.
i was hoping and praying for nothing.

right.
my brothers coming home tmr.
all my homework's going onto his desk.

the bdiv won their match todayy. ((=.
41-11 !

throw me a lifeline
7:54 PM

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